How to pass the emissions test

[Snork]

Well my car got back from the mechanic after getting a bunch of stuff including a thermostat and a new radiator. Basically the engine is running like new now. The reason i resorted to a mechanic was cause the car was not passing emissions. After all this it still does not, thought it works a lot better. The mechanic said that the cats heat up so they're at least decent. He then suggested i put a injection cleaning additive in and change to oil to try passing emissions. Is there anything else I can do to the car to help it pass? It's very dissappointing right now, because it runs like a brand new car, but still gets a big black R on the inspection. What are some tricks you guys used to pass emissions?

[Robin-535im]

What are some tricks you guys used to pass emissions?

A friend of mine went to a local engine shop and bought a few gallons of pure ethanol ( I think... ) and diluted the gas with it until his 2000 chevy v8 just barely ran. Passed with flying colors.

[attack eagle]

I paid the guy an extra $30 under the table... suddenly my emission output matched exactly an unmolested newer car there

[Sam-Son]

pay off the mechanic

[Snork]

I just paid him 740 dollars, if that's not paying him off, I don't know what is. But seriously, he's a really nice guy and is very professional. Maybe I need to find a crooked mechanic... I mean how did my e28 pass inspection? That thing was running rich like nobody's business, the mechanic took it to some inspection place and it passed.

But I think emissions is something the guys can't really fake. I mean they can overlook some safety issues if they are so inclined, but unless I actually knew someone who was actively substituting cars to pass emissions, that seems like a bad option. I don't want to insult my good mechanic by bribing him.
The ethanol idea sounds pretty good though... Anything else? Anyone have problems passing emissions and then passed it without cheating somehow?

[repenttokyo]

move to Quebec, land of zero emissions tests.

[e34.535i.sport]

I don't know how but my 535i (1990) has the lowest emmisions i've heard of...Over here we're allowed up to 1200ppm (parts per million) of carbon and mine recently passed with 39ppm!

I don't know if this works but some people fill up with high grade petrol, put in an engine additive and take it on a good long blast on the motorway... I done it the day before mine went in. Anythings worth a shot. Good luck.

[Snork]

move to Quebec, land of zero emissions tests.

I can live in your house then, eh?

[Sam-Son]

seriously ask your mechanic how you can get your car to pass. maybe he might get the idea of passing it for you or maybe he'll suggest somethin serious

[Dave M]

I can live in your house then, eh?

Eh, I resemble that comment. Mass-hole

Dave