So, as it turns out:
1 - Oil change. Painless.
2 - Reset SRS light. Painless.
3 - Immaculate (they said it looked brand new) guibo. Yay!
4 - No visible wear on drive shaft / center bearing. Yay!
5 - Wheel bearings sound fine. Yay!
6 - Road test reveals tire noise from cupping, which could easily be a result of driving on the shimmy for a couple thousand miles.
Best $100.00 I've ever spent on this car. Can't wait for these crummy tires to wear out so I can get rid of that noise. Track day, anyone?
1995 525iM - 131k - Alternator play, broken s-belt
1995 525iA - 147k - Tensioner weirdness, broken s-belt
2001 Intgra GS-R - 130k - spun bearing
2002 Honda Odyssey - 80k - fragged transmission