Well, it was fun while it lasted......

[Brian C.]

.....My attempted repair this past weekend I mean, of course. So here's the story.....

A few weeks ago I noticed that my passanger side low-beam was missing it's "lens" cover. See first photo.....new on left, old on right.......

Being the mechanical genius that I am, I immediately asked all you guys how to replace the lens. Well, in short order I was informed that the "lens" that I'd refered to was in fact only a broken off part of a bigger whole. In actuality I needed to replace the entire lamp-housing assembly. Hmmm, I thought. Do I really need to continue to finance my Dealer's kid's European Vacation? No. I bet that I could do this on my own! Ya know....I got a Bentley....got my ETK, TIS, a BLT and a BFH. AND, I always have YOU GUYS! What more could I need to do a satisfactory job? Just a new part. So I call BMA and speak to Yves and explain my situation. Bingo-bango-badda-bing! No problem! A new lamp housing is FedEx-ing it's way to me ASAP. Lamp and chrome ring.....$142. Just for grins I call the dealer and they want $268. I feel smarter already! It arrives in three days, but I don't find time until this past Saturday morning to try to get it done. I'm thinking that I replace the old lamp with the new, hit the car wash and meet up with the guys who are at the South Florida Bimmer Meet about 20 minutes from my house.

To make a long story, which will be continued at a later date, short....after taking 2 hours to figure out how to remove the E34's grill and another hour to get the lamp housing out, I think I should be done in no time. Now, while looking at the first photo, sing to yourself that old Sesame Street classic, "One of these things is not like the other.....one of these things just doesn't belong.....". Can you figure it out? Yep, the first time that BMA has done me wrong and sent the wrong part. They sent a driver's side and I needed a passenger's side housing. OYE! You can see in the next photo how I needed to cut parts off of the old one to save the rubber sleaves on the mounting screws.

What this means is that I couldn't put it all back together untill I get the part replaced by BMA. DOUBLE OYE! So I'm driving around, looking like a Pirate at Mardi Gras for a while. A one-eyed E34! I'll try to re-tackle the job this weekend if I get the correct part from BMA this week. I took photos of most of the procedure, so I'll try to post how the grill, etc. was removed and the R&R of the housing. While the grill was off, I did finally replace my horns with ones that I got off E-Bay for ten bucks. So I got that goin' for me!

So let's recap here. I figured out how to remove the grill. I figured out how to R&R the lamp housing, even though I wasn't successful in doing so......yet. I R&R'd my broken horns with good ones. I actually didn't BREAK ANYTHING! I actually didn't smash my thumb or draw any blood! And I figured out how to rig the grill with duct tape and twist'ems until I can finish the job! All in all not too bad of a Saturday's work. Sorry I missed the meet at Markham Park guys....it was a long day. I hope next time.

Now for a question. As the green arrow points out.....what is that thingee for? It's a soft rubber sleave that fits over a part that looks like some sort of probe that goes into the lamp housing. My first guess was that it was some sort of "optic pipe" to get light to another area of the engine compartment. But as I tore apart the old one I could see that it was filled with some kind of particulate matter. Now I'm thinking it's a moisture-remover-thingee for the inside of the lamp. I dunno.......Any ideas???

To be continued.................

Brian C.
'95 525ia

[Scott H]

I've had my front off about 5 times now messing with headlights, etc. It's not fun anymore for me.

Is your experience from this project going to keep you from embarking on others? Or has it sparked your interest in taking apart others sections of a perfectly good car?

[Brian C.]

.....in what I do by the fact that it's the only car I have to get to work on Monday morning! And.....and this is a big and.....there aren't too many times of the year here that I'd consider doing repair work outside my house. Saturday was beautiful, with 75 degrees, 45% humidity, nice breeze.......not too many "nice" days like that here. Come April 'til November it'll be 85-90 degrees and 95% humidity most every day. And then it'll start raining! No garage. Am I whining enough yet? Yes, I'm going to start to try to do more stuff. I'm going broke taking it to guys @ $108/hr! I'm thinking my next project will be my headliner. You do that yet? Big PIA?

Brian C.

[ryan roopnarine]

the fancy schmancy people i take my car to don't even charge 108, and they always have one or two porsches on the lift every time i go there. at least your car doesn't break every 500 miles, forcing you to fix crap.....got to do a headliner too....and a blower resistor, and seat cables, and put bulbs back in the fogs, and get the right washer jet to start working again, and change my differential fluid, and take the engine out of the car so i can fix some of the crap installation the last mech did putting in the engine....and put a new flywheel in while im in there cause the starter probably ate it up, and make sure the damn dirty starter is in straight....not to mention a microfilter, door vinyl bubbling out on 2/4 doors, and i may as well redo the tint while im queerin' round with the doors. envious of you, really.

.....in what I do by the fact that it's the only car I have to get to work on Monday morning! And.....and this is a big and.....there aren't too many times of the year here that I'd consider doing repair work outside my house. Saturday was beautiful, with 75 degrees, 45% humidity, nice breeze.......not too many "nice" days like that here. Come April 'til November it'll be 85-90 degrees and 95% humidity most every day. And then it'll start raining! No garage. Am I whining enough yet? Yes, I'm going to start to try to do more stuff. I'm going broke taking it to guys @ $108/hr! I'm thinking my next project will be my headliner. You do that yet? Big PIA?

Brian C.

[kiNGMak]

how did you remove the front grill? i am going to do that tomorrow..

[Brian C.]

"Let's see.....it costs X everywhere else.......we'll charge 2.7X here!" And with my car it's alway stuff that I really can't do. Like the a/c and ****! It drives me everywhere including CRAZY! I'm trying to do more though.

I tried to look up your thermostat in the TIS, but nothing. I got no clue. But for $108/hr I know someone..............

Brian C.

[Brian C.]

.....and I'll post a couple of photos in a couple of minutes.

This is from Ed.
Grill Removal

Brian C.

[Brian C.]

The photos from Ed were a big help, but here are a few more. I didn't take all I needed since I'm not done with my install, but the grill comes off with the removal of the one screw or wedge on top, then with the hood open, the two center, upper clips by pushing them forward from the engine compartment.

Then the two center, lower clips need to be pushed from inside the lower grill area towards the engine compartment.

Now you will need that 10" screw driver, or I used a long metal rod, to run down this hole to push down the clip at the bottom. These are at the sides of the hood by the open supports, by the directional lights.

Now you should be able to wiggle the grill off. Put a large flat head driver between the seam here, by where this screw comes off, to work it forward. Remove this screw to remove the side lamp grills.

Once you know where to pry, it isn't as hard as it sounds. Hey! I did it!!

Good luck........

Brian C.

[Bill R.]

until the grease no longer scrubs off your hands and becomes a permanent part.... nice pics.
And to agree with Scott its a thingamajig to let moisture and condensation escape

The photos from Ed were a big help, but here are a few more. I didn't take all I needed since I'm not done with my install, but the grill comes off with the removal of the one screw or wedge on top, then with the hood open, the two center, upper clips by pushing them forward from the engine compartment.

Then the two center, lower clips need to be pushed from inside the lower grill area towards the engine compartment.

Now you will need that 10" screw driver, or I used a long metal rod, to run down this hole to push down the clip at the bottom. These are at the sides of the hood by the open supports, by the directional lights.

Now you should be able to wiggle the grill off. Put a large flat head driver between the seam here, by where this screw comes off, to work it forward. Remove this screw to remove the side lamp grills.

Once you know where to pry, it isn't as hard as it sounds. Hey! I did it!!

Good luck........

Brian C.

[DanDombrowski]

You know Braman BMW in Miami (where my car was originally sold believe it or not) charges a $1,000 "where else are you gonna buy a BMW in Miami" fee, and they laugh about it? Whats worse is that people pay it.