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View Full Version : OT: me and my gf had an argumenet, advice needed



markus
04-26-2007, 08:37 PM
tonight me and my gf got into an argument. i dont feel like explaining it but im 20 and shes 18. we are almost 3 years apart in age because her birthday is october and mine is in august. anyway she told me that even though she really cares about me, she just cant be open enough with me and wishes she can be good enough for me. she thinks that i dont want to be with her anymore. i told her i do but i wish she was more open otherwise we wouldnt argue so much.

mind you we are going out for 6 months. we broke up before and had to get her back and did 3 months ago. shouldd i just stick with it or let it go? she graduates high school in june. and i knw after i got out of HS i grew up fast.

632 Regal
04-26-2007, 08:47 PM
lol, my sluts 10 years younger and we argued 3 times in 2 years. Need to communicate man, my 1st ex...argue every day, several times too. BPD, I thought it was me...expensive lesson.

step back and evaluate your situation like an outsider, should help.

18..hmm.... maybe you give her my cell # ?

Denton
04-26-2007, 08:55 PM
haha ask Bf.C

Blitzkrieg Bob
04-26-2007, 09:10 PM
http://www.bimmer.info/forum/showthread.php?t=32261

Were worried about knock'n up a few weeks ago...

Too much drama

rob101
04-26-2007, 09:37 PM
Too much drama
when i hear "she just cant be open enough with me" I'd say leave her be and she might snap out of it, if you break up on good terms you could probably pick it up later should you wish. If she can't be "open" with you and your arguing all the time after 6 months sounds like its not working and not going to work until someone changes and that isn't going to happen whilst in a relationship.

Enjoy being single for a while and the peace of not having to argue with someone you care about. Being in a bad relationship is a bad situation for both parties.

bmwrp8
04-26-2007, 10:29 PM
my gf and I has been going out for a little more than 10 years...she's 4 years older than me and i'm 25...communication is the answer and being honest to each other but your only going out for 6months she might not open up at you that deep...don't be to demanding on her and just be more understanding..Be smooth:p my gf did'nt open up before till we were about 10 months..then its been smooth...alittle fights left and right and a couple o breakups for the past 10 years but thats all normal:D goodluck

Incantation
04-27-2007, 02:53 AM
you wear the pants.
there is nothing to argue.
if she's not down, let her walk.. who the fuk cares.
next

Morgenster
04-27-2007, 03:36 AM
tonight me and my gf got into an argument. i dont feel like explaining it but im 20 and shes 18. we are almost 3 years apart in age because her birthday is october and mine is in august. anyway she told me that even though she really cares about me, she just cant be open enough with me and wishes she can be good enough for me.

Does she wish to do better or does she wish you to expect less of her? Don't get me wrong here, but I kinda get the feeling she feels pressured.


she thinks that i dont want to be with her anymore.

Where does she get that idea? Did she specify this by telling you what behaviour causes this?


i told her i do but i wish she was more open otherwise we wouldnt argue so much.

Are you saying that you wouldn't stay unless she opens up? sounds like an ultimatum and in all fairness kinda needy (no offence man).


mind you we are going out for 6 months. we broke up before and had to get her back and did 3 months ago. shouldd i just stick with it or let it go? she graduates high school in june. and i knw after i got out of HS i grew up fast. AFAIK: that's a big gap to cross and the changes involved are often detrimental to relationships (when too much pressure is involved). Same goes for transitions from college to work. Usually that's because lifestyle changes (independance, financial responsibilities, work etc.) will lead to changed behaviour overall.

Macv
04-27-2007, 06:00 AM
She sounds too young for a relationship. It'll be one of those "argue every month" deals. Ditch her until you find someone that can handle herself.

Ross
04-27-2007, 07:52 AM
Lose her. Go get some strange and get over it, she's a child still.

dacoyote
04-27-2007, 08:14 AM
Got Pics?

ILoveMPower
04-27-2007, 08:20 AM
She sounds too young for a relationship. It'll be one of those "argue every month" deals. Ditch her until you find someone that can handle herself.

I second that, and I just got out of one of these myself. It hurts but you're better off getting out now before you get in too deep.

Robin-535im
04-27-2007, 09:16 AM
my gf and I has been going out for a little more than 10 years...she's 4 years older than me and i'm 25.

Dude - you rock. 15 and dating a 19 year old...

Back on topic... more "someone else's life" advice, can't resist.
The world is has a practically limitless number of really interesting, cool, fun, beautiful people (and lots of other types too). Appreciate what you have with the current person but if it's not perfect, don't close youself off from other people. Having a good mate is very important for your health and quality of life... keep looking. The Right person will be 95%-99% perfect; you still have to work at the relationship but only 1%-5% of the time. These numbers are exact, BTW... :)

Dave M
04-27-2007, 01:04 PM
Dude - you rock. 15 and dating a 19 year old...

Back on topic... more "someone else's life" advice, can't resist.
The world is has a practically limitless number of really interesting, cool, fun, beautiful people (and lots of other types too). Appreciate what you have with the current person but if it's not perfect, don't close youself off from other people. Having a good mate is very important for your health and quality of life... keep looking. The Right person will be 95%-99% perfect; you still have to work at the relationship but only 1%-5% of the time. These numbers are exact, BTW... :)

Good advice Robin.

My wife tok a looooong time to find and it was fun shopping :D. BTW, we do all our disagreeing at once, when I'm away.

Dave

attack eagle
04-27-2007, 07:15 PM
IF she's not even out of highschool yet and you are, it's time to part ways. She is going to want that in another 4 months anyway, so you might as well bail now... OR you can stick it out for some regular poon for the next 4 months. Hell, tell her "You are going to be going off to school soon and everything will change, and you will want to be free to enjoy those changes, so lets enjoy each other's company these last couple of months until it's time for you to go" and leave it at that. No exclusivity, no pressure, but definately a nookie option.
Just know that you should break up with her before she goes off to college. It is the right thing for both of you.

In a few years after she has had her chance to grow up, make mistakes etc, then maybe the timing will be right... then again by then you may be happy elsewhere.

Blitzkrieg Bob
04-27-2007, 07:52 PM
Nothing says "good bye" like a good load.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cleveland_steamer

Macv
04-27-2007, 08:57 PM
Cleveland Steamer?
http://www.acemart.com/graphics/00000001/products/CLE21CET8MCS.jpg

632 Regal
04-27-2007, 09:30 PM
I dont think thats what he was thinking about besides poopoo

Robin-535im
04-27-2007, 11:19 PM
Nothing says "good bye" like a good load.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cleveland_steamer
Thank you Bob. Thank you for that pleasant image. Ahhh... the internet. :)

VentoGT
04-30-2007, 12:26 PM
Once she gets out of high school it probably isn't going to continue either way, you will learn a lot in the coming years about relationships, but you don't know **** at 18...

ryan roopnarine
04-30-2007, 01:20 PM
i don't have a place to host it right now, or i'd post a picture of the HA HA guy saying


HA HA
Should Have Called Stanley Steemer
instead of Cleveland Steamer!

SC David
04-30-2007, 03:55 PM
Meh, you're at a bad age to be dating younger. It's not worth the effort. Look for someone your age or older.

632 Regal
04-30-2007, 05:06 PM
that could be an issue but young chix rule!

Meh, you're at a bad age to be dating younger. It's not worth the effort. Look for someone your age or older.

shrike071
04-30-2007, 09:01 PM
18 is still a child... Hell, so is 20. I got married at 23 because I thought I was 'all grown up' and I was divorced by 25.

It's nothing short of shocking how much you'll change and mature from 20-25, then 25-30. After 30, it's all downhill.... I'm 35 and what your girlfriend would consider "a creepy old guy".

attack eagle
04-30-2007, 09:39 PM
It's nothing short of shocking how much you'll change and mature from 20-25, then 25-30. After 30, it's all downhill.... I'm 35 and what your girlfriend would consider "a creepy old guy".

+1 on the old guy bit... 32 here and can't stand listening/seeing whatever these former kindergardeners think is cool.

RobPatt
05-01-2007, 01:28 AM
all depends what you're looking for....

and knowing what you like is a good thing. :-)


that could be an issue but young chix rule!

632 Regal
05-01-2007, 10:55 AM
young * tight * clean * maintained * small * virgin...I can teach.
all depends what you're looking for....

and knowing what you like is a good thing. :-)