I would guess the rubber gasket is worn. you shouldnt put any kind of lube on it because it may pop off when you tighten the clamp...(LOL).
It might be possible the plastic shrunk but I doubt it.
Did you loosen the other side of the elbow to make it workable? Mine popped off on the lower side and took a while to figure out the leak. Dry the lube off and try again with the thing real loose, tighten the engine side first.
95 E34 530I V2.37
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John F. Kennedy